DID YOU HEAR THE ONE ABOUT THE GUY IN NEBRASKA THAT SUED G-D?

That’s right. If you did not read about it elsewhere, let me be the one to tell you about it: a man in Nebraska sued G-d. In his lawsuit, he blamed G-d for terrorism, tornadoes, and a host of other ills. His point, he said, was to prove that anyone can file a lawsuit about anything in this country. Let me be the first to predict what this lawsuit will prove: our system of justice works.

How can that be? I am sure many people thought the fact that a lawsuit can be filed against G-d is proof of a broken system. I mean, regardless of your own beliefs, I think we all agree that the Almighty is not going to be served with a lawsuit and show up to defend himself in a Nebraska courtroom. How ridiculous it is to sue G-d, and how horrible is a system that allows it to happen? And how can I tell you that this lawsuit against G-d will prove to everybody that our justice system works? I will answer that final question very soon. First, it is necessary to understand how our system works.

It is true: anybody can sue anyone at anytime for any reason. That is a fact. You can sue me because you do not like the shoes I am wearing. I can sue you because you do not understand just how great the Michigan State University basketball team is. Your neighbor can sue his wife for failing to order the food he wanted at a restaurant. A student can sue a professor because she thinks the professor talks too much in class. And, yes, anyone can sue G-d for causing tornadoes, terrorism, floods, the University of Michigan football team, and any other evil that affects our lives.

You see, to “sue” someone just means that someone has taken a piece of paper, written the word “Complaint” on it, paid a fee and given that piece of paper to the court. When a lawsuit is filed (i.e. when the piece of paper is given to the Court) there is no judge sitting at the front desk, reading every piece of paper the moment it is filed. Instead, someone hands gives the papers, pays the fee, and a lawsuit has officially “been filed.” Somebody has been sued. That is it. That simple.

Guess what? Those ridiculous lawsuits you read about. That is all that occurred: somebody wrote something on a piece of paper, paid money, and the lawsuit was filed. In some states, the lawsuit can be hand-written on a napkin, and it would still be accepted.

See, once we all understand that a lawsuit is nothing more than allegations, the fact that a lawsuit has been filed has far less meaning. Did you hear the one about the kids that sued McDonalds and Burger King for making them fat? How about the woman who sued for the loss of her psychic powers? Or this one, the guy that filed a lawsuit against G-d for the bad things that happen in the world?

You know what all of these lawsuits – and almost all the other ridiculous lawsuits that make it to the papers or television – have in common? They all get DISMISSED. Thrown out of court. Sometimes, the person who filed them gets fined or jailed for contempt of court for filing such a ridiculous lawsuit. The baseless lawsuits almost never even get heard by a jury, let alone win. The system gets rid of them quickly. Dismisses them. In other words: THE SYSTEM WORKS!

Unfortunately, the imminent dismissal of these bogus lawsuits (which are a tiny fraction of the number of lawsuits that are filed) almost never get media coverage. I am not blaming the media: it is more interesting to hear that a ridiculous lawsuit was filed than to hear the lawsuit was later thrown out of court. Since we cannot have judges read every piece of paper at the moment it is handed in at the front desk of the courthouse, silly lawsuits will get continue to filed. But the allegation – the lawsuit – will usually be quickly dismissed when it is as baseless as the cases that earn media coverage often are.

Will there be more silly or baseless lawsuits that you see or read about? Of, course. And they will almost always be followed up by quick dismissals they deserve. Now, about this lawsuit against G-d: Anyone else wonder how this man intends to serve G-d with the papers?

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